Stop Hitting Yourself: An Introduction to Internal Family Systems
Introduction to IFS
Let’s talk about Internal Family Systems (IFS). My name is Benjamin McCauley. I am a Level 1 Trained IFS practitioner, and the owner of Denovo Therapy, a psychedelic therapy center in Lubbock, Texas.
Internal Family Systems is one of the more recent advancements in the field of mental health, but it is not a “new” methodology. Developed in the 1980’s by Richard Schwartz, IFS is a respectful, comprehensive treatment option that is well-suited to address many of the most pressing mental health concerns we are currently facing.
I’ve been doing this for a while. I’ve seen IFS help people who were completely new to therapy as well as therapy “veterans” who needed something more on their path to healing. It’s flexibility and adaptive nature make it a good fit for a wide variety of people and presenting issues.
IFS has been gaining recognition and popularity in the field of psychotherapy and has been applied in various clinical settings. It has been used to address a wide range of mental health issues, including trauma, anxiety, depression, and relationship problems. Despite its relatively recent development, IFS has become well-established and widely practiced in the field of psychotherapy.
Internal Family Systems is an innovative, effective intervention and I am excited to share more about the fundamentals of this model of care with you. Keep reading to learn what Internal Family Systems is, how it works, and if it might be a good fit for you.
What is IFS?
Internal Family Systems (IFS) is an evidence-based therapeutic method of helping people founded on the principle that our internal emotional and thought systems are constructed of multiple “parts”. These parts interact with each other to create what we might refer to as the personality and/or ego (this is what you are referring to when you say “I” or “me”). These parts are all inherently good and serve a function of some kind for us.
Parts of Self
IFS is based on the idea that people have multiple “parts” within themselves, each with its own beliefs, emotions, and desires. These parts can sometimes conflict with one another and create internal struggles.
I’m working on a deep dive into IFS’s understanding of parts to publish in the next few months so this will just be a quick overview, but you can subscribe to my blog here to make sure you get that as soon as it’s live.
As an IFS practitioner, I try to help people understand and work with their internal parts to promote healing and unity. This involves helping the client identify their parts and then get to know them by understanding their roles and motivations. Throughout the process, we cultivate self-leadership and self-compassion so the client can continue to heal and grow in their day-to- day lives.
Parts are Normal
Having different parts isn’t as strange as it sounds. We’ve all experienced wanting to do something while another “part” of us is resistant to the idea. It’s even woven into our language: “Part of me wants to do x, but another part of me want to do y.” Having a sense of internal conflict is pretty normal to humans.
Our parts play roles to help us navigate the world. These roles are initially helpful, but the things that happen to us can shift how a part functions and cause it to adopt a role that is harmful or destructive. Events like stress and trauma, or even normal life stage transitions and changes, can cause a fracturing of the parts, changing their job. We see this in everyday life where a behavior that is adaptive in one environment can be maladaptive in another. Soldiers returning from war often struggle with this.
IFS sessions help a client get to know their different parts and provide a way of working with them by healing the burdens and beliefs that may be causing disturbance. All of this is done with the intention of returning the part to a healthy and harmonious role. This is where the idea of the Self plays an important part.
The Self in IFS
In Internal Family Systems, the multiplicity of parts is just the way we’re all built, and relates to the important concept of the Self.
The “Self” refers to the core, undamaged, and inherently wise aspect of your psyche. It is considered the essential and authentic part of a person that exists beneath various protective layers and psychological defenses.
The Self, as opposed to the parts, represents a transcendent and unifying presence that can provide guidance, compassion, and healing. It is characterized by qualities such as calmness, curiosity, clarity, compassion, confidence, and connectedness. The Self is the true essence of an individual, and helping the client access and strengthen the connection to the Self is a primary goal of the IFS practitioner.
A natural, balanced self can effectively lead and harmonize the internal system. This allows the parts to function in healthier and more adaptive ways. We do not want to eliminate or suppress parts, but we want to help establish a cooperative and compassionate relationship between them with the Self serving as a guide and mediator.
Ultimately, the idea of the Self in IFS recognizes the inherent wholeness and wisdom within each individual. It provides a framework for understanding and integrating the various parts of oneself, leading to personal growth, healing, and increased well-being.
IFS in Action
Let me give you an example to help make this all more concrete.
I had a client who had a very anxious mother. The anxious mother’s voice turned into a part in the client that manifested as an internal critic. This voice would worry and complain and criticize everything the client did. It was constant to the point that it was difficult for my client to differentiate between his own internal voice and his mother’s criticism. My client didn’t know if he honestly wanted to do something or if he was being prodded to do it by this internalized mother/critic.
Once we identified this internal critic part, we were able to gather up the energy from it and send it back to his mother. This allowed him to recognize his own voice, his own hopes, his own goals, and his own dreams. This opened a whole new world as he began working from an internal locus of control rather than an external one.
As we further developed the relationship with this part, we were able to help him relate to her concerns through his Self instead of his parts. This allowed him to hear the critic without necessarily accepting what it had to say. By turning the internal critic’s volume down without suppressing or repressing it, he gave himself permission to consider valid criticisms and concerns that might arise from it without having to accept everything it had to say.
This is a good example of identifying a part and helping it return to healthy functioning, without pathologizing it as “bad”. Neither the internal critic or the client’s mother had intended him harm. They were speaking from a place of worry and anxiety, both of which are normal parts of being human and may even be necessary sometimes. By helping him change his relationship to the internal critic and interact with it through his Self, the internal critic was allowed to settle back into its rightful place as part of his internal family.
How Do You Practice IFS?
Practicing IFS typically involves a combination of self-exploration, self-reflection, and intentional work with an IFS practitioner. The IFS process involves identifying and understanding the different parts within an individual’s internal system and helping them develop a relationship with them. This is done through a process called “parts work” or “parts dialogue'“ where the practitioner helps the individual explore and communicate with their various parts.
The information about how to practice Internal Family Systems is available to anyone online, and there are many books, blogs, and videos about it. In general, IFS is used as an additional modality by licensed professional counselors, licensed clinical social workers, psychologist, and other mental health professionals. As a believer in the unique efficacy and particular usefulness of Internal Family Systems, I am happy to see this.
That being said, I am not a licensed mental health professional and IFS is not simply another theory I like. If we are clarifying our terms, we can say that a vast majority of licensed mental health professionals who use Internal Family Systems as part of their practice see it as one tool in the toolbox, rather than the path they have chosen to focus on in helping other people. My goal is to become an expert with this one tool, and use it wherever it is appropriate.
IFS Trained versus IFS Informed
It’s important to understand the difference between someone who is IFS informed, versus someone who IFS trained. The people I’ve mentioned above, who I support using Internal Family Systems, are what we would call IFS informed. They may have read a few books, they may have heard about it in grad school, or they may have been to a training by people outside the Internal Family Systems organization. They have a broad, but limited knowledge of Internal Family Systems.
I am working on becoming an IFRS trained practitioner. I would like to tell you a little bit about this process because there is a lot of leeway when it comes to certifications.
Life coaching is a certification industry. There is no oversight regarding who can call themselves a life coach. I know people who have completed multiyear courses of training that required the investment of thousands of dollars and time spent under the mentoring of trained and experienced coaches to be certified. I also know someone who got a life coaching certification through a $15 Groupon that took 2 1/2 hours. The difference in the amount of education for two people holding the same certification is troubling.
As an IFS practitioner, I involve myself in self-study, books, videos, and seminars as they arise, but these are to supplement my official training through the Internal Family Systems Organization. For my level one training I had two go through a lottery to even have the opportunity to apply. Many people go through the lottery multiple times before being allowed to apply.
Once I made it through the lottery, I had to go through an application process and document my experience in the field of mental health before putting down a sizable investment in my education (I don’t want to be too specific, but it is in the tens of thousands of dollars range).
Having gone through both in-person and online training with experienced professionals (including an entire week in New York with Richard Schwartz, the founder of Internal Family Systems), I’m now required to attend additional official trainings as well as show continuing education hours. I am also required to demonstrate competency to an official IFS Certified Consultant in the form of recorded sessions. Official trainings are thorough. They consist of didactic material as well as me sitting with people as an IFS practitioner and doing IFS with them, while a supervisor watches live, either in-person or online. They give live feedback, and do not hesitate to stop the process in order to correct or improve the technique I am using. To be certified
I tell you about all this because it’s important to me that people understand how intensive the training to become an IFS practitioner is, and to help illustrate the difference between someone who is IFS informed versus someone who is IFS trained.
As I said, I support therapists and other mental health professionals who use IFRS as part of their toolbox, but I do not think they have the depth of knowledge or nuance to practice it as well as someone who dedicates themselves the level of training that the IFS organization requires.
Is IFS Safe?
Internal Family Systems is considered a safe therapeutic approach when practiced responsibly and under the guidance of a qualified practitioner. IFS is a well-established model that has been used effectively in clinical settings for several decades.
This isn’t to say it is easy or fun. IFS can bring up challenging emotions and memories as you explore and engage with different parts of yourself. You must approach this work with self-care, patience, and support. Working with a trained IFS practitioner can provide a safe and supportive environment for this exploration, as we can help you navigate any difficult or overwhelming experiences that may arise.
Additionally, it’s essential to prioritize your own well-being and assess your readiness for engaging in inner work. If you have a history of severe trauma or mental health concerns, it’s important to consult with a qualified professional who can evaluate whether IFS is appropriate for you and provide the necessary support throughout the process. These are all further reasons I think that being IFS trained rather than simply informed is so important.
Is IFS Right for You?
Internal Family Systems can be effective for a wide range of presenting symptoms and mental health concerns. IFS is an especially versatile approach, but it has been particularly recognized or its effectiveness in the following areas:
Trauma
IFS’s gentle and empowering approach can be especially useful with trauma. IFS helps clients develop a safe and compassionate relationship with traumatized parts, allowing for healing, integration, and resolution of traumatic experiences.
Anxiety and Depression
IFS can be helpful for people experiencing anxiety and depression by exploring the underlying parts and their associated emotions, beliefs, and memories. It facilitates understanding, acceptance, and transformation of these parts, leading to symptom reduction and improved emotional well-being.
Relationship Issues
IFS can be beneficial in working through relationship challenges, both in romantic partnerships and interpersonal dynamics in general. By exploring the different parts involved in relationships, people can gain insight into their own patterns, fears, and needs, leading to better communication, empathy, and connection.
Self-Esteem and Self-Worth
IFS assists peoples in cultivating self-compassion, self-acceptance, and a stronger sense of self- worth. By understanding and healing parts that carry self-critical or self-sabotaging beliefs, people can develop a more positive relationship with themselves.
Emotional Regulation
IFS provides techniques for working with difficult emotions and enhancing emotional regulation skills. By developing a compassionate and curious stance toward emotions, we can explore and address the underlying parts that contribute to emotional dysregulation.
Exceptions
While Internal Family Systems can be effective for a variety of mental health concerns, there are be some situations where alternative treatment approaches may be more appropriate. It’s important to consult with a qualified mental health professional to assess your specific needs and determine the best course of treatment.
Here are a few situations where caution or a different approach may be considered:
Severe Psychotic Disorders
IFS is not typically used as the primary treatment for severe psychotic disorders such as schizophrenia, where potential clients may experience significant impairments testing reality and require specialized interventions, including medication management.
Acute Crisis or Suicidality
In situations of acute crisis or high suicidality, immediate safety and stabilization must take precedence. Crisis intervention, safety planning, and intensive support may be necessary before engaging in deeper therapeutic work like IFS.
Severe Substance Use Disorders
While IFS can complement substance use treatment, serious substance use may require specialized interventions, such as detox, rehab, or harm reduction strategies, as the primary focus of treatment.
Severe Dissociative Disorders
People with serious dissociative disorders, such as Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID), often require specialized treatment approaches that specifically address their dissociative symptoms, such as Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) or specialized trauma-focused therapies.
Intellectual Disabilities
Significant intellectual disabilities may require adaptations and modifications to the IFS model to ensure accessibility and effectiveness. Working with a practitioner experienced in both IFS and intellectual disabilities is important in such cases.
These considerations do not imply that IFS cannot be used with other treatments or in different capacities for these conditions. Each client’s circumstances are unique, and an assessment by a mental health professional will help determine the most suitable approach for their specific needs.
Conclusion
That’s a lot of words. Let’s sum it all up:
Internal Family Systems is unique and effective. It focuses on growth and helps people understand and work with the multiple “parts” within themselves. Developed in the 1980s by Richard Schwartz, IFS recognizes that these parts can sometimes come into conflict with each other, leading to internal struggles and mental health concerns.
IFS is versatile and can be integrated with other therapeutic approaches, making it a comprehensive model of care. It has been shown to be effective in treating a wide range of mental health concerns, including trauma, anxiety, depression, addiction, and relationship issues.
It is important to approach IFS with care and to be prepared for the potential challenges that may arise as you explore and engage with different parts of yourself. Working with a qualified practitioner ensures a safe and supportive environment for this exploration.
Overall, Internal Family Systems offers a respectful, empowering, and effective therapeutic approach that helps people cultivate harmony within themselves and live more fulfilling lives. Whether you are new to therapy or seeking an alternative to traditional approaches, IFS can be a valuable tool in your journey towards healing and personal growth. I would love to be a part of that journey. Get in touch with me here.
